Reika-sama – 169

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If it’s not on there, please feel free and ask. I only get annoyed at questions when the same one has been asked 10+ times, and by then I’ll have updated the FAQ. Thank you for your consideration, guys!


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On the day of the party I was told to immediately head to the hair salon after school. There, they did my hair and make-up, before leaving with Okaasama straight for the hotel where the party was being held.

Otousama and Oniisama would be headed here after work so until then I decided to just have a sandwich and study in the waiting room or something. I didn’t want to get my dress creased so I’d leave it off until the last minute. Tonight I would be wearing a loose dress.

Hm, this ham sandwich was pretty good.

“Reika-san, you shouldn’t eat too much. You won’t be able to fit in your dress.”

Okaay…

*

Apparently they hadn’t been lying to me about this being an important party for us. Even Ririna who was just a relative was here. Her exams were coming up too. I could sympathise with her family issues cutting down on her study time. Huh, Ririna had better grades than me, didn’t she. Maybe I could ask for her study methods later.

As for me, although I was the daughter of the chairman, not only was I still a high schooler, but I wasn’t even the heir. Today I was basically just here as an extra. All I had to do was stand with my family and keep smiling.

After a while, Otousama was surrounded by other important men, while Okaasama was surrounded by ladies she was close with, so I decided to leave and wander about to see if there was somewhere with less people.

Oniisama had already been caught by the same girls who were aiming to be his bride. Godspeed, Oniisama.

I greeted people with a smile as I walked about until I came across Narutomi Akimi-san. She was the young woman I met at the fasting course.

“Akimi-san.”

“Ah, Reika-san.”

A little chubby-looking, for some reason I felt really warm and relaxed around her.

“Thank you very much for inviting me tonight.”

“Thank you for attending when you must be so busy.”

She noticed me looking at the food in her hands.

“The food here is really good. I think I might have eaten too much,” she smiled in embarrassment.

“My, I am overjoyed that it is to your taste.”

I constantly told Otousama that the most important thing for these parties was the food. These corporate parties were already boring at best, so if the food wasn’t even yummy what the hell was even the point.

And since I was talking about food anyhow, I made sure to tell him to make sure the company cafeteria was good too. If the employees had good food then they’d be more motivated.

That meant one step further away from our downfall! It’s important to start with the small things.

“Will you not be eating, Reika-san?”

“Ehh, perhaps later…”

Yeah. Even if the food was great, it was difficult as an ojousama to eat your fill at these parties. Reapplying the gloss was a pain, and if you ate too much your stomach would bulge too. And for careless people like me it would be a disaster if I accidentally got some sauce on my dress.

Still, we’d be bringing home the food that you could take home, so I could enjoy myself later~

The scallops meunière that she was having looked great.

I think I wanted some too. I wonder if it was on the list of take-home foods.

A few men suddenly passed us.

“Of course the fatty is eating,” said one of them, and the others laughed along.

Akimi-san’s expression changed in a heartbeat.

What assholes!

I had just taken a step in their direction when Akimi-san stopped me.

“Akimi-san?”

“It’s fine, Reika-san.”

“But…”

“I am fat…” she smiled feebly.

What did that have to do with anything. Somebody needed to teach those insensitive assholes the fear of god!

She didn’t have to worry so much. It’s wasn’t like I was going to charge up and tell them to apologise.

Any apology I could wring out of idiots like them would just be insincere, and in the process it would turn her into a spectacle.

You had to fight fire with fire.

Instead, I was planning to flick some brown demiglace sauce on the butt of their trousers.

Then all I had to do was shame them!

“Goodness. What in heavens is that stench…” or something like that!

You guys should just be forever known as the poop boys! Ukekekekekekekekeke!

“Please excuse me. I’m going to touch up my makeup…”

Akimi-san placed her empty dish down and she left the room as I watched her go. Once she was gone, I headed off for my journey of revenge.

When I came back from my journey, I noticed Imari-sama waving at me.

“Imari-sama!”

“Good evening, Reika-chan.”

And goodness, he was just radiating mature charm once again.

“That wine red dress you’re wearing this evening is a bit more mature than usual. I couldn’t help but stare. You were like a rose spirit.”

Hauu! An arrow of bewitchment shot through my heart!

Luckily I had high resistance from knowing him since I was little!

Imari-sama picked out a glass of non-alcoholic wine for me in the colour of my dress. Popular men were always attentive to these sort of things.

We chatted about Oniisama for a while before touching on the topic I was most interested in.

“By the way, Imari-sama, is the story about you being stabbed by a woman true?”

“Eh!? Reika-chan, how did you know about that!? Did you hear it from Takateru?”

“A little bird told me.”

I couldn’t exactly answer ‘Eavesdropping.’ now could I?

“Ah boy, I never would have thought that you knew, Reika-chan. But calling it stabbing is just exaggerating.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah. I just got into a bit of a tiff with a woman who was holding a knife, and it just happened to cut my left palm a bit. Look. See? Thanks to that the fortunes off my palm readings have completely changed.”

When I looked there really was a small white scar.

Still, stabbing or not, blood really had been spilt. What kind of life was Imari-sama even living…

Oh, hang on. Could it be…?

“Come to think of it, when you were a high school student in Suiran you were in the Basketball Club, were you not?”

“Ohh! So you remembered~ That’s right. I was in the Basketball Club. God, that brings back memories~”

Oh my god! So being some womaniser was actually characteristic of the Suiran Basketball Club!?

Suiran Academy’s Boy’s Basketball Club.
A.K.A. the Casanova Village, sworn enemies of the Forever Alone Village.

“Reika-san!”

While we continued to chat, Ririna came trotting over.

“Oh, Ririna.”

“It’s been a while, Ririna-chan.”

“Gokigen’yoh, Imari-sama. Geez, it took so long to get away from Okaasama!” she huffed as she took a drink from a server.

After having a gulp, she sighed.

“My condolences,” I offered.

“Ririna-chan, you’re wearing a bit of lily perfume today, aren’t you. It’s a perfect fit for your name, isn’t it, just like your dress tonight is a perfect fit for you.”

Oh my god! Apparently the Chief of the Casanova Village possessed a skill that allowed him to identify women’s perfumes too. No wonder he was Chief.

“Thank you…” replied Ririna as her mouth threatened to smile happily.

Her mood had taken a 180 with just a few words. One day Imari-sama was going to get stabbed for real.

Since I noticed Akimi-san coming back, I signalled her over. I hoped she was okay now. Maybe it was just an excuse for her to go cry…

She was smiling as she came over, but she was startled when she realised Imari-sama was standing next to me.

“Akimi-san. I think you may already know, but this is Momozono Imari-sama. He and my Oniisama have been friends since they were young. Imari-sama, this is Narutomi Akimi-san, whose care I have enjoyed. As for this girl, her name is Kotou Ririna, my younger cousin.”

“U-Um, please to meet you. My name is Narutomi Akimi…”

“Nice to meet you. Reika-chan never told me she had such a lovely friend. So how do you write ‘Akimi’?”

“U-, Umm, ‘aki’ as in ‘refulgent’, and ‘mi’ as in ‘beautiful’…”

“I see, I see. It suits you perfectly. Perhaps a drink then, for the lovely lady.”

Akimi-san was flustered and bright red. I wasn’t surprised.

Casanova Village Chief, I see what kind of life you live…

Ah well, as long as Akimi-san wasn’t sad anymore.

But Akimi-san looked completely entranced by him. Oh dear. Akimi-san, that’s a bad man, you know~

“Good evening, Kisshouin-san.”

This time it was Kaburagi and Enjou. Ueeehh…

Oh. In front of the three shining young men, Akimi-san had blown a fuse.

Hang in there, Akimi-san!


“Oh my god! So the Suiran Basketball Club was actually characteristic of being some womaniser’s hang out!?”

Excerpt from Chapter 154:

 

Last was the Basketball Club.

Oh my, no need to look so scared. I only have one line for you.

“You laid your hands on your senpai’s girlfriend, did you not?”

 


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Reika-sama – 168

Everybody, please check the FAQ first before asking me questions.
If it’s not on there, please feel free and ask. I only get annoyed at questions when the same one has been asked 10+ times, and by then I’ll have updated the FAQ. Thank you for your consideration, guys!


Join the Evil God Army on discord!
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Hi guys! Looking for experienced cleaners or type-setters to help with the Tashinami scanlations.


To my fellow Reika slaves,

How are you? I’m doing quite well myself.
It’s been two weeks since we’ve last spoken, hasn’t it.

Lately I’ve been quite busy between university finals and some minor re-skilling at my job.

I apologise for the lateness of this translation.

I do have some good, if unrelated, news though! Second Life is getting official translations!

https://j-novel.club/c/walking-my-second-path-in-life-volume-1-part-1

The author and editors were all really nice about it, so I’m 100% happy for them!

Please support these translations if you’re still interested.


Aoi-chan messaged me.

Apparently that stubborn boy from my school was now completely avoiding her at cram school.

‘But when it was me, he wouldn’t listen no matter how many times I tried. You’re so amazing, Reika-chan! How on earth did you do it?’

Geez. I just talked to him a little, that’s all.

As for the boy, he even reformed and stopped harassing Wakaba-chan. All’s well that ends well, huh?

After all, before getting jealous of other people, you should think about improving through your own efforts first, right? Yup, yup.

Haha. Not that this was just somebody else’s problem. The term-end tests were fast approaching. If I wanted to cling to my position on the rankings board then I needed to study for my life.

Wakaba-chan was always topping that list. How on earth did she study, I wonder.

*

And just as I was determined to spend all my time studying, Otousama told me that I had to attend our family’s corporate party.

I was still a high schooler, as a minor to boot, so I always insisted on avoiding these business parties. This time, though, I apparently had to show my face as the chairman’s daughter. Urghh~

Okaasama was in high spirits about it. Between dragging me to beauty salons, hair salons, and dress shopping, I was finding no time for studying at all. This was bad. This was really bad.

I guess my only choice at this point was to cut down on sleep to get some studying done. Ugaaaaah!

*

*

*

Despite my lack of time, at school I still had to hide that I was frantically studying. I avoided my textbooks during lunch breaks and instead hung out with my friends.

“Have you heard? Apparently Kaburagi-sama visits Enjou-sama’s classroom every day.”

“I have. He speaks to Takamichi-san every time, right? What on earth is Kaburagi-sama thinking.”

“I still think it’s just a whim, but…”

“Right?”

It was almost certain that Kaburagi liked Wakaba-chan. Everybody knew this too, but they didn’t want to admit it.

Both Tsuruhana-san and the other girls who didn’t see Wakaba-chan kindly were using every opportunity to pick on her. Unfortunately it wasn’t something so obvious that Kaburagi noticed.

Maybe that was why, unlike in the manga, their relationship hadn’t progressed at all.

I suppose a clear threat like the manga’s Kisshouin Reika was necessary after all. Not to say I was even thinking of sticking my neck out for their romance. They would just have to work something out on their own.

Besides their lack of progress though, I got the feeling that both Kaburagi and Wakaba-chan were in quite a different relationship to their manga counterparts.

In Kimidol, Kaburagi was more mature. He was normally cool and collected, but when it came to Wakaba-chan he burned with passion; the kind of character that could tickle a maiden’s heart. How on earth he turned out as an athletics carnival-obsessed man-child instead I have no idea.

And Wakaba-chan wasn’t any different. In the manga she was more… Well, she was more normal I suppose… Never in anybody’s wildest dreams would she have stood around with her jaw hanging open, or have come to school in gumboots of all things, or gone foraging in the Suiran Forest, or, and I stress this, have been the kind of steel-skinned girl who paid her bullies absolutely no mind at all.

Ah, no, I mean, I know that the real Wakaba-chan is doing her best too, though, but I still couldn’t help but think she was a completely different person to the Wakaba-chan I knew.

Really, it was throwing me all off.

*

*

*

The tests were coming soon so I was taking a break from my club. I couldn’t avoid at least showing up at the salon though. Haah, socialising was such a pain.

Lately I noticed the President’s faction discussing something with complicated expressions. It was kind of scaring me… I wasn’t sure what they were talking about but I could guess it was something to do with Wakaba-chan or the Student Council.

Let sleeping dogs lie. I didn’t see anything. I didn’t hear anything. The only thing I’m thinking about is the dessert in front of my eyes, I swear.

Which was a charlotte aux pommes today, incidentally.

Charlotte aux pommes, or an apple charlotte cake. What Reika enjoyed was most likely a ‘bowl’ made from cake similar to bread or spongecake, and with layers of things such as custard, apple slices, fresh cream, mousse, apple puree, or crème bavaroise.

The faint tanginess of the apples was delicious. I actually liked apple pies better, but having a charlotte sometimes was fantastic.

While I was indulging in sweets-assisted escapism, shockingly Yukino-kun had entered the room with Enjou!

“Yukino-kun!”

“Reika-oneesan!” he beamed the moment he spotted me.

Yukino-kun ran over to me.

“Yukino-kun, why are you here today?”

“Ehehe, I asked Oniisama to bring me here to play.”

Aaah! What an angelic smile! All of the stress and weariness in my heart was disappearing!

“Yukino, make sure to greet everyone else first,” Enjou said as he placed a hand on Yukino-kun’s head from behind.

“Ah, oops,” said Yukino-kun as he turned around and bowed. “My name is Enjou Yukino. Pleased to meet you.”

With the smile of an angel, naturally.

Just that was enough to lift the mood of the salon. The girls in particular had their hearts taken by his adorable charm.

“What a wonderful day it is that Enjou-sama has brought his younger brother along! Yukino-sama, we are very pleased to meet you.”

The President sat Yukino-kun down in the middle of the sofa, and had tea and sweets brought over to the table. Despite looking troubled by the crowd of surrounding oneesama, he answered each question with a smile.

Off on the side, Enjou watched Yukino-kun as he spoke to me.

“Yukino said that he wanted to see you no matter what, so I gave in and brought him here.”

“Goodness! I am very happy to hear that!”

He said he wanted to see me! I wanted to see you too, Yukino-kun!

Still, since he had been taken by the President and her friends, I would just wait here quietly until he returned.

Until then I suppose I could keep chatting with Enjou~

“Is Kaburagi-sama not with you today?”

“Apparently he had something on.”

“I see.”

‘Something’ huh. He better not have gone to Wakaba-chan’s cake shop or something.

“Masaya’s been kind of restless recently,” he said as his lips curved upwards.

Your smile is scaring me.

“I see.”

The best choice was probably just to ignore it until the subject changed.

“Yeah. And lately he keeps coming to my class for some reason. It doesn’t seem to be me though.”

Geh! And he’s telling that to me!?

“My, is that so.”

“It is.”

We smiled at each other. Yukino-kun, hurry up and come baaaaack! Your Oniisan is scaring meee!

By the time Yukino-kun had been released by the President’s crowd, I was exhausted from the probing. I was curious about what Kaburagi wanted, yes, but on the other hand hearing all of this from Enjou was triggering danger signs in my head. Enjou pretty much only smiled like this when he was plotting something.

Yukino-kun, who was totally unlike his two-faced older brother, told me about how he had been practising his latte art recently.

“Reika-oneesan, I heard that you’re particular about the Chinese Zodiac. I’ll try my very best so that I can finish all twelve of them!”

Who was it!? Who was it that put weird lies into Yukino-kun’s head!?

I tried to clear up the misunderstanding but Yukino-kun wasn’t listening at all.

“Right now I’m working on making the Ox.”

Drawing an ox with milk huh. Well, I suppose it’s not like it didn’t fit, but…


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Turf War – Chapter 22

Everybody, please check the FAQ first before asking me questions.
If it’s not on there, please feel free and ask. I only get annoyed at questions when the same one has been asked 10+ times, and by then I’ll have updated the FAQ.

Thank you for your consideration, guys!


Join the Evil God Army on discord!

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Hourensou means spinach, but it’s also a mnemonic for,
houkoku – report
renraku – communicate
soudan – discuss
which is a sort of basic standard for working in any organisation.

Also sorry for the delay, friends. I kept putting it off because of its length, but the next one will come out a lot sooner.


Chapter 22 – Edim and the Fiend Liquidation Mission

This was a room in the Evil God Army’s Underground Empire. It was an expansive room, its interiors luxuriously decorated, and was a more splendorous place than the entire mansions of many nobles.

Compared to the rest of the rooms in the Underground Empire however, it was slightly below average.

This room belonged to the Evil God Army’s Vampire Unit. Sitting in the centre of the room was their Captain, Arhas Edim, who was currently listening to a report from Dalf, her subordinate and kin.

“Reporting. My third-order kin Daisy and three others were expelled from the guards.”

“I see. Good work. You are dismissed.”

“Milady.”

Dalf bowed and left the room.

Edim looked at the report in her hand.

*

Including those last four, fourteen members my kin in core government positions had already been exiled from the country. Worse yet, others had been executed as well, which made recalling them an impossibility.

Having my kin die didn’t bother me so much as the fact that their use as pawns had gone to waste. All of this was due to the newly returned Sam Gordon.

It was a nostalgic name. I heard it a lot back when I was a human.

Known as the Fiend for the various legends that monster had created…

Heh. Monster? Now that I knew who the true monsters of this world were, the whole thing was just a huge farce.

He was nothing more than a gnat. And an annoying gnat, at that. What if I just got rid of him? I could send Dalf and a team to take his head for me.

No, I wouldn’t do something so overt for now. ‘Hoe Ren Soe’ was the key here, as Tilea-sama always emphasised to us. Nielsen-sama was often scolded because he forgot to keep ‘Hoe Ren Soe’ in mind. I wouldn’t make the same mistake. This problem could wait until the next war meeting, where I could bring it up for discussion. I would just warn Dalf and the others to keep Gordon out of our territory.

Phew~ I suppose now would be a good time to stop work for today…

Each day I performed my duties as the Captain of the Vampire Unit. As the head of a network that spanned the entire nation these duties were never-ending. Had I still been in my human body I would have long since collapsed from the toil. Yet another reason to be overjoyed at my powerful vampiric body.

After completing my regular duties for the day, it was about time to head back to the Academy dorms for the night. That was when the door opened.

Who?

I looked over to find that the visitor was none other than Tilea-sama.

Tilea-sama carefully looked here and there, checking all directions before she entered.

W-, What on earth was she doing? Clearing the room for something private? I was really the only one here. Was all this examination really necessary…?

“U-, Um, Tilea-sama――”

“Sshhhhh!” she silenced me with her index finger over her lips. Not in such a loud voice then.

“Tilea-sama, can I help you?”

“I actually have something really important to talk to you about, Edim. Can you come meet me in Meeting Room C?”

“Understood.”

“Also this is a secret so don’t let anybody see you, okay? Especially Timu.”

Eh!? Something that even Camilla-sama couldn’t know…?

And Tilea-sama, it’s impossible for me to get to Meeting Room C without anybody seeing me.

No matter how I tried there were just too many of the officers around. It was impossible for me to avoid their detection with my level of ability.

“Tilea-sama, it is impossible for――”

“Anyhow, I’ll meet you there. I’ve got to go tell Or too.”

“Ah-! Please wai――”

Having said what she wanted to she flew out of the room.

What now?

If I tried to sneak there I wouldn’t get mistaken for an assassin and killed, would I?

Aahh, if only I had Bernandes-sama’s ability to sneak. This was impossible for me.

What if I practiced…? No, just spending a few minutes would change nothing.

Mmm. Impossible. But sitting here agonising over it would get me nowhere.

I decided to just walk normally. If anybody asked where I was going I could give them some excuse.

Half-consigned, I headed for my destination, taking each step carefully as I kept possible excuses in mind. For good or ill I came across nobody along the way.

What good luck! I was almost there n――

“Where are you going?”

“Hyaaaaah!”

The sounds from behind scared me.

W-, Why…! I let my guard down! How was I going to get out of――wai-, this was…

“Jay Jay?”

“Yes. I am pleased to see you well, Edim-sama. This is a splendid place. The furnishings and large rooms are befitting of your personal headquarters, Edim-sama.”

“Youuu insoleeeent…!”

“Hoberah!”

I immediately smashed Jay Jay into the wall. He moaned as his face was half buried in it.

I would be fine if he just died. My personal headquarters? It was obviously Tilea-sama’s personal headquarters!

What an dangerous thing to say. If anybody heard that they might even doubt my loyalties.

It was actually a problem I was worrying about. Apparently my kin were loyal to me instead of Tilea-sama. I would need to find some way of re-educating them.

At any rate, I was in the middle of carrying out orders. I decided to hasten along.

Not long after I reached Meeting Room C despite the trouble with Jay Jay.

Ortissio-sama had arrived as well. He seemed nervous. I noted the sweat running down his face, and the fact that he was loitering outside the room instead of entering.

I suppose I couldn’t blame him considering the way Tilea-sama suddenly called for us.

It reminded me of back when I was still a student and the Headmaster called me out. I was only new to the Academy at the time and having the head of the school suddenly calling me out was the most nervewracking experience I had ever had at the time.

Of course, looking back now it all felt like a joke. Compared to being called out by Tilea-sama it was like Heaven and Earth.

“Ortissio-sama, will you not be entering the room?”

“Edim. Do you have any idea what she’s called us here for?”

“No, I cannot say I do.”

“I see. I don’t either… No, but wait. Could it be? No, no, but it couldn’t be, could it?” he mumbled to himself.

I was given the impression that Ortissio-sama might have some clue.

The impression that the other officers had of Ortissio-sama was harsh. Even the War Councils were just another opportunity to censure him. Somehow it felt like he was always being scolded, and I think because of that he was expecting to be scolded again.

“Ortissio-sama, shall we head inside firs――”

“Edim, do you think she’s called us out here to reprimand us?”

“I, I truly cannot say. I can’t think of anything I’ve done that would deserve such a thing.”

“I see. I can think of too many things, however…”

I really wish he wouldn’t say that. I would be fine. I was doing my job properly. But now I couldn’t help but feel nervous.

Uuu, don’t tell me that I was going to get in trouble because of something Ortissio-sama did?

“Standing here thinking about it will get us nowhere, Ortissio-sama. Let us enter.”

“True. We can’t be keeping Tilea-sama waiting.”

Resolved, we entered the room.

“”Humbly reporting for duty, Tilea-sama.””

“Thank you for coming.”

Tilea-sama seemed to be thinking about something. After those few words she fell into silence. Were we really going to be scolded?

“Tilea-sama…?” I tried.

“U-Umm… the truth is…”

“Yes?”

“Uuu, I can’t. I can’t say it after all.”

Words that even the mighty Tilea-sama hesitated to speak? If we were just going to be scolded there would be no reason for this.

In that case…

I was running the possibilities through my head when Ortissio-sama said something laced with meaning, before finally dropping a bombshell.

Tilea-sama wanted to liquidate Camilla-sama!?

N-No way. The words were so shocking that my mind froze in its tracks.

W-, What was I do to…

If Ortissio-sama was right then I had reached a crossroads of no return. Tilea-sama was the foremost commander of the Evil God Army. By all means, her word was law.

But Camilla-sama was my everything…

Both my heart and body belonged to her. Opposing her was unthinkable. I didn’t even want to consider the idea.

“I-I don’t want that. I can’t betray Camilla-sama,” I told him.

“Enough, Edim! Uuu, I-I don’t want to either…” he replied in tears.

“So let’s…”

“Enough. We must endure it for the Evil God Army! Even Tilea-sama didn’t want to do this.”

“That’s enough, Or,” Tilea-sama suddenly interrupted, “If you keep saying stupid things I’ll pull out your tongue.”

“Hiiie! M-My deepest apologies.”

Tilea-sama seemed outraged at just the idea.

Of course. It was obvious to anybody that Tilea-sama cherished Camilla-sama. Why would she order her death. Honestly, I was annoyed at Ortissio-sama now for jumping the gun. Perhaps our leaders had a point in criticising Ortissio-sama.

Tilea-sama began to explain what we were here for. Coincidentally, it was regarding the very issue that had been on my mind.

It was honestly a little anti-climactic. This was hardly an issue worthy of her attention, let alone concern. Far from going there myself, it was something I thought I would solve by sending a few of my first-order kin.

When Tilea-sama was finished speaking I left the room. Ortissio-sama was fired up beyond belief. Not that I could blame him. Tilea-sama had personally given us an order. There was no doubt that he saw this as a chance for him to turn his fortunes around and restore his honour.

“Edim, we must succeed at this mission no matter what!”

“Yes sir. Of course, sir.”

“Let’s hurry up and plan then.”

“As you wish, sir.”

The two of us headed into an empty room and began to discuss the plan…

A little while later…

Hahh, I think we’d been at it for almost a whole hour now. And this mission was supposed to be so simple too…

Our discussion just wasn’t going well. I think it was because Ortissio-sama was too enthusiastic about it. At every point in the planning he would butt in and insist that he be responsible for the infiltration instead.

To be frank I didn’t want to agree, especially given how desperate for merits he was. Although he was on another level of combat strength than I was, I couldn’t help but get the feeling that he would mess this up somehow.

And honestly, it wasn’t as though I didn’t want to do this myself either. Tilea-sama had especially called for me to do this. Why would I want to hand it over. If I succeeded, wouldn’t Tilea-sama praise me? Wouldn’t Camilla-sama praise me as well?

“Hey, are you really going to be fine on your own? If you don’t think you’re up to it I’m willing to swap places with you.”

“No, no, Ortissio-sama. I am fine. There is not a problem.”

Geez, how many times had this been already? I wish he would just get the message. Didn’t he even understand that we were just wasting precious time like this? We were on a deadline.

I was right not to leave this to him. It was unacceptable to allow a mission as simple as this end in failure.

“I see… But you know, if I went instead, we could kill even more of them.”

“Ortissio-sama, Tilea-sama’s orders specified that I would infiltrate, and that you would be supporting. Tilea-sama would not have been mistaken.”

“Yes, but by extension that support should include…”

“O-, Ortissio-sama, please. How many times must we repeat this? We have already spent an hour on this, Ortissio-sama. If we continue to waste our time here, at this rate the sun will rise and we will fail the mission.”

“Mumu, you’re right in that time is wasting. Can’t be helped. The lead role is in your hands, Edim.”

Hah, finally.

In the end I would be infiltrating the mansion and taking Gordon’s head, just as Tilea-sama ordered. Ortissio and his Second Division would be surrounding the property in the one-in-a-million chance that Gordon managed to escape me.

…Exactly the same as Tilea-sama’s orders. This meeting could have been over in five minutes. Was there really a need to talk so much?

I was losing more faith in Ortissio-sama.

It was worrying. Right now Ortissio-sama wasn’t thinking properly. I wasn’t even sure I could leave the encirclement to him.

I decided to give orders to my subordinates in clandestine. I was going to message Dalf telepathically with my orders. This telepathy was something I could only use with my direct kin.

Telepathy activate!

『Dalf. A matter of great urgency has come up.』

『Why if it isn’t Edim-sama. It must be quite a big deal for you to be using telepathy.』

『Indeed. A direct order from Tilea-sama. From this moment forth we commence the liquidation of the Fiend.』

『As you wish. Then I shall send out orders to our forces to immediately assemble for a general offensive on the――』

『Wait. No need for something so exaggerated. All you lot need to do is encircle the mansion. I’ll take the Fiend’s head.』

『Edim-sama, going alone is… Please excuse me for speaking out of turn, but I recommend you take a guard detachment.』

『Unnecessary. I will hardly lose to a human.

『I understand your might, Edim-sama. However this is still the infamous Fiend. If something goes wrong, having at least one person… Please take myself or Milio along with you.』

『Unnecessary.』

『However…』

『Enough. Stop now before I consider it disrespect.』

『Y-Yes, milady.』

『Well then, Dalf, I’ll entrust the matter to you.』

『As you will. In that case I will assign the east, west, and north to Milio, Cass, and Jin respectively. Not a single ant will get past us.』

『I’ll leave it to you.』

That was done now. I wasn’t going to tell Ortissio-sama but wasn’t that fine? The more the better for an encirclement.

All that was left was the infiltrate…

“Ortissio-sama, it’s about time――” I called out to him.

Unfortunately he was giving orders to a lot of messengers and didn’t notice me.

W-, What on earth was this man doing…?

Orders were flying left and right. He really was too excited. Was he planning on mobilising the entire Second Division just for a mere human?

He was even calling back captains in the middle of campaigns abroad, and even adding prisoners of war to the encirclement. This was overkill.

I frantically tried to stop him.

“U-Umm, Ortissio-sama, please excuse me but perhaps this mission doesn’t warrant going as far as to recall your subordinates from abroad. Just the people here right now should be enough.”

“Edim. ‘One-in-a-million’. If by some one-in-a-million chance we fail to kill him are you going to be the one to take responsibility! How do you plan on taking responsibility if Tilea-sama loses faith in me!?”

It was pointless even discussing this with him. Ah well. I wouldn’t waste my time on it then. All I had to do was fetch Gordon’s head. Everything else would follow.

Just then, Dryas-sama came out to see what the noise was about.

“There you are, Ortissio! Who told you to call your soldiers back to the Capital!?” he demanded angrily.

As the Chief of General Staff, the one who managed our soldiers and missions was Dryas-sama. It was quite likely that his plans had been ruined by Ortissio-sama’s actions.

“Chief. I have a reason for moving my soldiers.”

“And what reason would that be? Depending on what you say, it may even be grounds for execu――”

“I ordered my soldiers to return here for a top secret mission from Tilea-sama,” he replied smugly.

Uwah…

Dryas-sama on the other hand looked astounded. Considering that it was the ever intellectual and composed Dryas-sama, Ortissio-sama’s words must have really shocked him.

“I… I see. A top secret mission from Tilea-sama… Given to you, Ortissio…?”

“Hmph. I’m not surprised that you don’t know. The orders came from Tilea-sama herself.”

“U-, Umu. In that case fulfil your duties as best you can. Worry not and use the soldiers as you need. I will take care of the rest.”

“Of course. After all, these orders came directly from Tilea-sama. Directly from Tilea-sama. It’s important so I said it twice.”

He even stole the last line from Tilea-sama…

The glee was written all over his face. During the last war council Dryas-sama really ripped him apart, so I guess this was his way of venting.

“O-, Ortissio, is there anything at all I can do to help? I would not begrudge you the assistance.”

“Chief, do you really understand what ‘top secret’ means? It means that the details are classified to anybody who Tilea-sama has not entrusted it to. I can’t even tell you about it.”

“Guh, nghn….”

“At any rate, I’m very busy with this, so please excuse me. I must prepare for the top secret mission. Goodness, if only we had you. I’m sure the planning would be over in an instant… Too bad that Tilea-sama hasn’t trusted you with it… Kuahahahahah!”

He was provoking him so blatantly…!

Dryas-sama? ――Uohh, s-scary… Dryas-sama was enraged.

The smile on his face was terrifying. Using Tilea-sama to provoke him like that was a sure-fire way to earn his hatred.

I couldn’t even imagine the consequences of deliberately enraging the Chief of Staff of the army.

“Edim,” Dryas-sama turned to me.

“Y-Yes?”

“Endeavour in your top secret mission from Tilea-sama.”

“O-Of course.”

“Of course she’ll try her best,” added Ortissio-sama, “After all, both Edim and I are that trusted by Tilea-sama after all.”

Please stop that, Ortissio-sama. Don’t get me involved as well. Please stop provoking him. Eek! The veins on Dryas-sama’s forehead are popping out.

Things were looking bad for me. It was time to wrap this up.

“U-, Umm, Ortissio-sama, we don’t really have that much time, so let’s go.”

“Umu. We have a lofty goal to accomplish, after all. Ahh~ If only there was a trusted Chief of Staff somewhere that could help us with our planning…”

Loudly guffawing, Ortissio-sama left the room.

Quickly, I trotted along after him. I’m begging you, Ortissio-sama, please don’t drag me in.

I was too afraid to check what kind of expression Dryas-sama was wearing.

Still running, I waited until I thought Dryas-sama was gone before speaking.

“Um, Ortissio-sama, perhaps it might be better if you didn’t provoke Dryas-sama too much.”

You’ll be the one to regret it later, you know.

“Listen, Edim. I first served Mamira-sama. Then Camilla-sama. Now I’m serving Tilea-sama. I’ve been serving for three generations. You could call me one of the oldest members.”

“Y-, Yes.”

“Even if that brat is Camilla-sama’s creation, do you think I could stand to be looked down on by somebody who isn’t even a year old!?” he roared indignantly.

He must have been holding it in for a long time. I could tell just how angry he was.

It was true that it hadn’t been a year since Dryas-sama was born. Part of the reason that he was so high ranked was thanks to Tilea-sama and Camilla-sama’s strong support. Did the rest of the veterans feel dissatisfied like Ortissio-sama?

After that, Ortissio-sama continued to vent about Dryas-sama. I just nodded along as I ran.

Before long we reached the front of the Fiend’s mansion. The members of his Second Division were already here, encircling the mansion together with the vampires I secretly called.

We were ready.

“Well then, Ortissio-sama, I will break into――”

“Wait, Edim.”

“Sir?”

Why did he stop me?

I… I was kinda getting a bad feeling about this.

Ortissio-sama gestured at his subordinates and they brought something forward in response.

A person? S-, Something smelt horrific.

Uuu, this was too much on my sharpened senses.

“W-, What is that…?”

“Some homeless person we caught while cleaning up. Edim, drink up so that you’re at your best!”

“Eh-!? U-Umm, are you telling me to drink his blood?”

“Obviously. You’re about to undergo an infiltration mission, Edim. I need you in tip-top shape. Drink his blood and power up.”

‘Power up’ he says…

I had a look at the person he prepared for me. His hair was sticky with grease, as well as dandruff and other filth. His clothes weren’t in any better shape either. Who knew when the last time he had a wash was. And he had this indescribable stink too.

Even a fourth, no, fifth-order, no, even the lowliest vampire I had in my squad wouldn’t have to suffer blood from a thing like this.

“P-Please calm down, Ortissio-sama. Just finishing off a human is a simple task. There is no need for me to…”

“Silence! What do you think this mission is? How will you take responsibility for failure? Are you intending on shaming me with you!?”

“N-No, I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Then drink up. We need you at your peak!”

Aah, this was such a bother. Maybe it would be best just to give in. It was probably going to be disgusting, but I needed to complete the mission.

“I, I understand. Then, here I go.”

Steeling myself, I sunk my fangs into this embodiment of nausea.

Ugh! Disgusting!

T-, This was even worse than I imagined. The sensation of sinking my teeth into this was…

Ugh, ogh. I was gagging. But I decided just to clear my mind and drink without thinking.

With each gulp a queasiness I couldn’t describe spread through my body.

T-, This was definitely a power down.

With teary eyes, I forced myself to finish up.

“Ugh, haah, haah, haah. I-I’ll be leaving now――”

“Wait, Edim.”

“Wh-, What is it this time!?”

“Here’s three more. Bottoms up.”

Three more vagrants were tossed in front of me. What did he want from me…?

“U-Umm, it’s all right, Ortissio-sama. Ughpu… I, I’ve had enough.”

“Nghn? Are you telling me you won’t drink the blood I prepared for you!? Edim, could it be that you’re making a fool of me!?”

“U-Umm, no, I really just don’t need it. Or rather, I’m so full I’m feeling ill――”

What!? You! At such an important moment you’re feeling ill!? I guess I really will have to go instead.”

Oh no. Not this again. I had to pull myself together.

“No, no, you misunderstand. I said that thanks to the blood you provided I’m feeling really well.”

“I see, I see. Then bottoms up. Gulp it all down!”

Three more of them…

And all three of them were even smellier and dirtier than the last. There were spots here and there on the skin. Maybe they were all sick with the same disease.

Actually weren’t they already rotting? They were dead. I wasn’t a necromancer!

Ugh, this was so filthy. Where was I even supposed to bite. Wasn’t there somewhere a bit cleaner? I looked the three corpses over but it was hopeless.

Kuh, but just looking at them was just wasting time. I gathered my determination and did it.

Mn!? O-Oeghh!

Uu, h-horrible. T-They were definitely diseased.

Oh no. This was definitely poison. Haah, haah, I was supposed to finish this? This wasn’t a joke.

Uu, s-save me, Camilla-sama.

Unfortunately Ortissio-sama wasn’t going to let me off. So cruel!

Instead I tried to imagine that it was blood given from Camilla-sama to get through it.

Enduring the nausea, I finally finished.

I, I was finally done. I-I wanted to praise myself, honestly.

“How were the seconds, Edim?”

“Ku, guh, haa, haa, f-fine… sir. A-Anyhow, I need to be going.”

“Mu! You seem to be tottering, Edim. This won’t affect your mission, will it?”

“N-, No sir. Uup… I, I just drank a little too much.”

“Honestly, this is because you got ahead of yourself.”

Haa, haa, I wanted to tell him that I was completely ill because of the filthy blood that he prepared for me.

But in that case I would have to let him perform the infiltration. And besides, I had the feeling that I wouldn’t be able to stop complaining if I started.

If I did that he’d kill me. Whatever else you said about him, Ortissio-sama was strong.

I, I didn’t want to die for such a stupid reason.

Haah, haah, this was so unreasonable. S-, So this is what Tilea-sama meant by “ab youso powah”, and why it was so bad. Subordinates feeling like idiots because of the tyranny of their superiors. Oh wait, or was this one “alko hole ab yous”…?

O-, Oh no. I was feeling trippy now. I, I had to concentrate on the mission.

“Haa, haa, w-well then, please excuse me.”

“Umu. If you haven’t taken his head by the hour, my troops will intervene. You understand?”

“Y-Yes sir.”

Within the hour… Could I do it? My body was being assaulted by dizziness. I was having trouble walking straight, and my body was shaking from the nausea. This was my first time feeling like this since I became a vampire.

C-, Could I kill the Fiend in this condition?

My earlier confidence was all but gone now.

I was astounded by Tilea-sama’s foresight. Never would I have expected that this simple mission would become this dangerous. The enemy was internal all along, wasn’t it.

It was exactly as Tilea-sama said; a dangerous mission with a survival rate of five percent, that might even lead to my death.


Haah, haah, this was so unreasonable. S-, So this is what Tilea-sama meant by “pawahara”(power harassment), and why it was so bad. Subordinates feeling like idiots because of the tyranny of their superiors. Oh wait, or was it “aruhara”(alcohol harassment)…?


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Reika-sama – 167

Everybody, please check the FAQ first before asking me questions.
If it’s not on there, please feel free and ask. I only get annoyed at questions when the same one has been asked 10+ times, and by then I’ll have updated the FAQ. Thank you for your consideration, guys!


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Shichi-Go-San (七五三, lit. “Seven-Five-Three”) is a traditional rite of passage and festival day in Japan for three- and seven-year-old girls and three- and five-year-old boys, held annually on November 15 to celebrate the growth and well-being of young children. Children are dressed up and then brought to a shrine for good fortune.

Hinamatsuri (雛祭り Hina-matsuri), also called Doll’s Day or Girls’ Day, is celebrated each year on March 3 when people pray for the happiness and healthy growth of girls. Families with young daughters mark this day by setting up a display of dolls inside the house. They offer rice crackers and other food to the dolls.
These dolls, often expensively made, are placed on stepped shelves covered with red fabric, and girls invite their friends to admire them.


The next weekend I used the excuse of buying cake to visit Wakaba-chan.

Her mum still remembered me, and greeted me with a smile.

“Oh my, welcome!”

“Good afternoon. Thank you for everything, last time.”

“Not at all! Thank you so much for the wonderful tea and coffee. Are you here to see Wakaba?”

“Yes, but I planned on buying some of your cakes as well. The ones I tried last time were simply delicious.”

“Really? Aunty was a little worried that it wouldn’t suit the tastes of an ojousama from Suiran.”

“That was not the case at all. They were fluffy, and sweet without being too sickening. I could eat any number of them.”

I had eaten two in a row when I got home. Then I waited a little while and ate the rest too. They were great…

I wondered what I would bring home this time.

“It makes me really happy to hear that. Wakaba still hasn’t come back from her part-time job yet, but she should be back any moment so come on inside.”

“Eh…? No, I really should not. I think I will head home for today. It was my fault for coming here unannounced. And to begin with my first goal was simply to buy some cakes.”

“Geez, you can worry about the cakes later. Do you have anything else going on today?”

“No, not particularly…”

As the Chief of Forever Alone Village, my weekends were almost completely free.

“Then just stay! You’ve already come all the way here. Don’t be shy now. Wakaba will be back any moment now. Okay?”

“But…”

“It’s fine, it’s fine.”

After asking the other staff member to take over for a bit, she came out from behind the display counter.

Taking my hand, she rather assertively ushered me into the house.

As I headed in, I noticed an awfully expensive-looking flower arrangement in the corner of the shop.

I had a bad feeling about it.

*

*

*

“Kisshouin-san, wasn’t it? Come in, come in. Here, sit down!”

After sitting me down on the couch she even brought out some black tea.

“Sorry. Not only have I arrived unannounced, I am even causing trouble for you like this…”

“It’s fine! A friend of Wakaba’s has come all the way here to play, so this much is natural. Oh, I know! I’ll go message Wakaba and let her know not to go on any detours.”

“I truly am sorry,” I bowed again.

Not everybody had as much free time on their hands as I did, after all. I was definitely in the wrong here for showing up without checking with her first.

But since I was here to eat something and bring some cakes home too, I just thought it would be nice if we could hang out a little.

“Um, it is not much but…”

Karintou is a traditional Japanese snack food. Sweet and deep-fried, it is made primarily of flour, yeast, and brown sugar.

I held out the box of assorted karintou.

“Hmm? What might this be? Oh my, you didn’t need to. Thank you though. Oh! It’s karintou. How cute~”

There were different flavours like plum and chilli, and they were divided into cute little sacks. The presentation was great. It was one of my favourites.

Plus, part of the reason I choose these was because I wasn’t sure if it would be rude gifting Japanese sweets to a family that ran a cake shop.

“If my anklebiters spot these they’ll be gone in an instant. Aunty will make sure to hide them somewhere safe,” she said as she hugged the bag with mock protectiveness.

“Huhu!”

I liked this interaction. It reminded me of my mum from my old life.

“Wakaba’s shift finishes at 2 so she should be here soon.”

“Oh, I see.”

It was almost half past two when I checked.

“How is Wakaba doing at school? Is that girl doing alright at a school like Suiran?”

Ugh! She hit where it hurt. No way did she know how hard Wakaba-chan had it at school.

“Yes. Takamichi-san’s grades are exceptional, and recently she even joined the Student Council, you know? She seems to be getting along splendidly with them.”

“I see. I’m glad that she’s managing,” she smiled in relief. It hurt to see.

“I’m back!”

That was when Wakaba-chan came back. I heard her footsteps against the floor as she ran into the room, taking off her scarf.

“You said that Kisshouin-san came over?”

When she saw me sitting on the sofa, she smiled.

“Welcome.”

Her mother and I welcomed her home, and I apologised to her for intruding.

“Since you’re here now, I’ll be heading back to the store,” said her mum, so I thanked her again before she left.

“So what’s up, Kisshouin-san? Did you need something?”

“Well, no… I just wanted to eat some of your cake again because they were so delicious last time. Since I was coming here anyhow, I just thought it might be nice to see you, was all.”

“Oh okay. Sorry for making you wait then.”

“No, it is my fault for suddenly coming here… I had no idea you worked though.”

“Eh? Ahh, yeah. Just for lunchtimes on weekends at a family restaurant. That time when I met you I was coming back from work too.”

“Oh, I see.”

That time when I was biting into the ikayaki huh.

ikayaki flashbacks…

“Aah, I’m pretty hungry. I haven’t had lunch yet so I’m going to get some curry. If you haven’t had lunch yet, do you want some too?”

“No, but thank you.”

“Really?”

Wakaba-chan stood in the kitchen and began heating a pot up. It didn’t take long for the appetising smell of curry to waft over to me.

Uu… my appetite…

From the rice cooker, Wakaba-chan spooned out rice onto a dish, and then on top of that she put her curry.

Hauu, it looked so good.

“Do you want a bite too?”

A bite… Just a bite wouldn’t be too shameless, right?

“Then, perhaps just a bite, since you offered.”

“Okay~”

And so Wakaba-chan placed two people’s worth of meals onto the table.

“Itadakimasu~”

“Itadakimasu.”

Carrot and large bits of potato in a curry sauce bought from the supermarket. Just a normal household’s meal. How I missed this.

I tried a bite. Yummy!

“It is delicious.”

“Yeah~ It’s because I left the vegetables to soak in the curry overnight. Aahh, food after a day of hard work is so good!”

We smiled as we ate.

“Still, working part-time is forbidden at Suiran, so it might be best if you did not go broadcasting that.”

“Oh, you’re right. I’ll take care!”

She really had to. It would be dreadful if her enemies found out.

“By the way, thank you so much for the shoes again. You really saved me. I tried washing those stained ones and it really didn’t help after all.”

“Oh I see. Please forget about that. I was never going to wear them again any how.”

I couldn’t bring myself to throw it away, but I didn’t want to wear them either. If anything I felt thankful that she took them off my hands.

“By the way, Takamichi-san, about what happened the other day…”

It was hard to ask, but I still brought up the tracksuit incident on that rainy day.

“Was that something that Tsuruhana-san and her friends had a hand in?”

“Eh? Hmmm…”

Wakaba-chan had a troubled expression on her face.

When she went home that day she was wearing her uniform, which was soaked just like she said, but I was sure that Tsuruhana-san’s group was somehow involved. Despite some subtle investigations though, I never did get the truth.

“Takamichi-san?”

“Umm, at lunch they called me out to the 1st floor emergency exit, said a bunch of things to me, and then shut me outside. Since the door was locked I couldn’t get back in, so I ran around to the front entrance. The rain was pretty bad though, so I guess I got kinda soaked~”

“So that was what happened…”

I had thought it wouldn’t be much worse than having a bucket of water poured on her. How could they have locked her out during the freezing November rain.

“Just so you know, this is just between the two of us, okay?”

“The two of us…? Are you not going to report them? You could talk to Mizusaki-kun about this.”

“Mizusaki-kun huh~ He was pretty persistent in asking what happened too, but I didn’t want to make a huge deal out of it.”

“But…”

“It’s fine. Nothing really happened.”

Um, something did happen though.

“Say, Takamichi-san.”

“Yes?”

“If things ever get too bad for you, I can have a word with Tsuruhana-san, you know?”

Although honestly she had even more influence than in middle school. Unlike back then, there was no guarantee that I’d come out on top. This newcomer was giving me just a bit of trouble.

“Ehh!? It’s totally fine. I wouldn’t want to trouble you. It’s fine, fine.”

“But…”

“Are you worried about me? Thanks,” she beamed.

“If only Kaburagi-sama thought a little more about his actions…”

“Ahaha, Kaburagi-kun is a pretty funny person, isn’t he?”

“Kaburagi-kun?” I asked.

“Ah,” she exclaimed before covering her mouth. “Ummm, Kaburagi-sama said ‘since you use -kun with Mizusaki, do that with me too’ so…”

Kaburagi… You’re such a damned child.

“I’m sorry,” apologised Wakaba-chan, “I wasn’t thinking about how you felt.”

She must have misunderstood my frown.

“Eh? Why are you apologising? I was simply thinking about how much trouble he must be causing you.”

“Huh…? But, don’t you, you know, like him?”

“Hah? ‘Like’? Who are you talking about? Surely you cannot be speaking about Kaburagi-sama and I. Because if you are, you are very mistaken.”

“Really?”

“Yes!” I stressed.

This was important, so I was being extra clear.

“I see. I heard the rumours, so I was sure that…”

“Rumours are nothing to put stock in.”

“I see~” she nodded with newfound enlightenment.

“By the way, I noticed some rather gorgeous flowers in your shopfront. Could those be…”

“Ah! You noticed? Yeah, Kaburagi-kun gave us those. The other day he came here to buy cakes and…”

“Goodness!”

So he really was coming here! Curse that guy for conquering all the cakes before I did.

“So did he come back here, or…?”

“Oh no, he didn’t. But he has been here before a few times while we were working out the bike incident.”

Heh. I won.

Not only was I allowed into the house, I was even treated to curry.

“Umm, would you be all right with me coming to buy your cakes again?”

“Of course! You’re super welcome here!”

“And if possible, keep this a secret from Kaburagi-sama…?”

“Ahaha, then it’ll just be our little secret. Gotcha~”

After that we exchanged emails, and with newly bought cakes in hand, I hummed to myself as I made my way home.

*

*

*

I opened up the message I just received. Umewaka-kun sent me photos of Beatrice in a red kimono for her shichigosan. She even had chitose ame next to her. It was a proper shichigosan.

Chitose ame (千歳飴), literally “thousand year candy”, is given to children on Shichi-Go-San. Chitose ame is long, thin, red and white candy, which symbolizes healthy growth and longevity. It is given in a bag decorated with a crane and a turtle, which represent long life in Japan.

And wow, I never knew dogs wore kimono too. Whoa! Don’t tell me that that Dog Maniac made it himself? No, no, it couldn’t be.

‘Bea-tan is three years old! The kimono fits me, right?’

Yup, yup, it looks great on you.

The next photo was of my Bea-tan doll in a matching kimono.

Apparently Umewaka-kun was a broadminded man who did not distinguish between his real and adopted daughters.

Hmm, but shichigosan huh. At this rate he was definitely going to buy Beatrice a full set of dolls for Hinamatsuri.

May Dog Lover-kun and Beatrice live happily ever after!


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Arachne – 11

The Disciple and the Goblins


“Yo! Sis, I ain’t moving away from here ‘til you take me as your disciple!”

Ephy, a boy around 15 years old, was sitting in front of my store and spewing some nonsense.

Contrary to his baby face, his body looked quite well-trained, and the various scars hinted towards him being some sort of fighter.

Or rather, he’s exactly the archetypal ‘Adventurer’ that one usually sees in fantasy worlds.

“Hey, listen, okay? You’re being a bother, sitting over there. This is my shop, you know?”

“Yo! I ain’t going anywhere! I’ve fallen in love with your skills! I want you to take me as your disciple!”

“And I’m telling you… You listening?!”

Aww man, this sucks.

Just why did this happen…

Ahhh… Umm.

Welcome back.

It is me, Arakura Shiori (25), an ex-earthling who has reincarnated as a half-human half-spider Arachne monster.

However, over here on this world, I’m called Shiori Arachne, the owner of the Arachne Tailor.

I’d been having a perfectly normal life as a tailor while hiding my true identity until now. Just why did this happen…

Everything started when I visited the adventurer’s guild the other day on business.

The main material I use for my store is, of course, the ‘Arachne Silk’ I created myself, and I acquire the expensive monster materials by myself too, but for the other relatively cheap materials used to make dyes, such as Thorny Madder Grass, Pseudo-Bellflowers, or Bitterdemon Chestnuts, I usually put up gathering requests like I’m doing now.

It’s not like I can use Crimson Dragon scales to dye the clothes that I make for the general public, obviously.

“Come on, why can’t I take that?! It’s just a simple gathering request!”

A young man… or to be more precise, a boy was shouting at the receptionist girl at the guild counter.

He’s got a solid build, with a leather chestplate and a short sword.

“…Usually, you’ll need to go deep inside forests with dense mana in order to find any Rainbow Morning Glories, you know? You’re still E rank. It’s too dangerous.”

“They’re just goblins, I won’t even break a sweat!”

“It’s true that sightings of goblins are still the most reported, but orcs have also been found there. That’s why the recommended request difficulty is D for a party and C for a solo adventurer. You mostly work alone anyway, right? If you really need the request, then please find some high rank adventurers to take you along.”

“Sure I know some D rank parties, like the ‘Iron Hammers’ and the ‘Treasure Hunters’… but the problem is they haven’t been showing up these days.”

My. Those are some familiar names.

Both the Iron Hammers and the Treasure Hunters were parties who had accepted my gathering requests, if I remember correctly.

“Those guys were going to spend the whole week over there gathering! They said they got their hand on a pretty tasty request, so they fucking went over to Cherry’s place for a party first before leaving! Bastards!”

The rest area inside the guild serves snacks and drinks with low alcoholic content.

And there, with his thundering voice, a bearded middle-aged man was telling the boy what he knew while sipping a mug of ale.

…The guy looked intimidating, but he’s surprisingly kind.

“For real?… Hey, miss Emmy, can you introduce someone? I’m cutting it seriously close with my rent this month.”

“That’s quite difficult… The only person not busy is Baren, and just as you can see, he’s about to fall down dead drunk.”

Emmy the receptionist glanced over at the aforementioned bearded man.

“…Is there really nobody high rank who’s free and willing to help me? Seriously?…”

“It’d be nice if there were… Somebody kind enough to bring along a useless kid on a gathering request…”

Miss Emmy, why did you just look at me when you said that?

I’ll have you know, I’m here as a customer today.

It’s true that I registered as an adventurer so that I can go gather in the dangerous zones that were closed off to the public… but my real job is being a tailor.

I only came here to ask about the progress on my gathering requests today, you know?

Heeeey, you listening, Emmyyyyy?

“Man, thanks a bunch. Of course I’ll protect you, girlie, no problem! You must be barely D rank anyway… and a rear-line adventurer too, right? Just tag along. Don’t worry, I heard that there’s only g-goblins near the Forest of Glamour where we’re going anyway.”

In the end, due to Emmy’s request, I took the boy – his name is Ephy – on the gathering request.

His destination, the Forest of Glamour, was the place where I once got lost in after going too deep.

Different from back then, this time, I have the skill [Minimap], [Hide Presence], and [Hide Magic] among others, so I no longer worry about getting lost, and animals and monsters don’t get scared of me anymore.

Mwahaha, I shall not make that mistake again!

I wonder how Zell is doing these days.

Whoops, can’t get distracted, I need to focus on Ephy right now.

He’s too much of a risk to not keep my eyes on him.

Apparently, Emmy told him that “If we’re just talking combat power, she’s at least a hundred times more powerful than you” when introducing me to him, and he couldn’t believe it to be anything other than a joke, so he kept trying to defend me and raising his sword at every single thing we encounter in the woods. However…

“Ephy, that’s a squirrel.”

“Y-Yeah, I know. Just in case. Wait, over here!”

“That’s a forest lizard. There’s nothing special about it. Tasty when roasted.”

“W-What the hell, just a lizard?… Damn thing surprised me.”

Ephy let out a held breath, wiped the sweat on his forehead, and relaxed his sword hand.

Hmm? You’re not catching it? What a pity, it’s really delicious… Then don’t mind if I do.

After checking my surroundings, I found a tree branch lying on the ground that’s big enough for my purpose.

Alright, this should be good enough as a handicap.

I lightly tapped the lizard, which was around 30 cm long, on its head.

*Bam!*

Ah, too much strength. The branch exploded, and the lizard’s upper half turned into minced meat.

The lizard wouldn’t even make a meal with just its lower half left. At best, only a snack.

I carefully used a small tree branch to scrape out the lizard’s innards, undid my Arachne Silk scarf, used it to wrap the lizard, then put the whole thing inside my pack.

It’s waterproof too, so I don’t have to worry about blood leaking out in the pack.

Normally, though, I wouldn’t bother with all this and just use my threads to package the prey directly.

“Uhh… Wha? What was that just now…?”

“Don’t worry about it, you’re just seeing things”

“Seeing things? But the lizard just disappeared…”

“I’m telling you, you’re seeing things. More importantly, our destination is deeper, right?”

“Ah, yeah. Probably another 30 minutes if we follow the animal trail…”

“Right then, let’s get the request over with quickly.”

After changing the topic, even if the attempt was a bit too abrupt, I pulled Ephy’s hand and headed deeper into the forest.

“We’re hereeeee! Look, look, jackpot! The whole field is full of Rainbow Morning Glories!”

Just as Ephy estimated, we arrived at a small, sunny flower bed after around 30 minutes.

The ground was filled with colorful flowers, looking similar to the morning glories I knew, all blooming in full.

But it’s already a little bit after noon now, yet they’re still blooming. Why are they called Morning Glories, then?

“Awesome! Rainbow Morning Glories are high rank materials, yet here we have a whole field full of it! Come on, miss, go grab some too!”

Ephy dropped his sword and started picking every stalk of flower that he can see.

Hey, is it fine leaving your sword there? You’re an adventurer, you know?

“No, I’ll stand watch. We’re still inside the forest anyway.”

“I~diot. Rainbow Morning Glories are used in making monster repellants, you know? Goblins and the likes wouldn’t even dare come close.”

Hmmm, is that so?

Yet I’m detecting presences of monsters somewhere quite close by. Hmmm.

Wait, perhaps…

I positioned myself in Ephy’s blind spot, quietly created a strand of thread from my finger, and used it to touch the flowers covering the whole ground.

And then, thanks to the effect of the skill Tactile ThreadSensor Web, details about the flower appeared in my mind.

——

Six-Shades Morning Glories

  ・A species related to the Rainbow Morning Glory.

   Unlike Rainbow Morning Glories, Six-Shades Morning Glories can’t repel monsters. Instead, their seeds are very tough, and cannot be dissolved by even a goblin’s stomach acid.

   The species mostly serves as food for herbivores or the omnivorous goblins. It makes use of the animals’ feces in order to spread its seeds to faraway lands.

   ・Is a main material in concocting energy-boosting medicines and aphrodisiacs. It has been theorized that the goblins’ unnatural reproductive power stemmed from the fact that this species of monster have a tendency to consume Six-Shades Morning Glories for fun.

——

Oh my.

The description I received wasn’t fit for showing children under eighteen.

I knew they were different from Rainbow Morning Glories.

It’s still a related species, so I guess we almost got it right.

…Which means that monsters aren’t being repelled.

In fact, goblins love eating these flowers, so…

“Whoa!!!”

Oh my. Just as I thought.

“G-G-G-G-G-Goblins?! Why? There’re Rainbow Morning Glories here!”

Ephy pointed his finger at the silhouettes of several goblins while stuttering like there’s no tomorrow.

I see, so the presences that have been shadowing us since a while ago were them.

They must have come out when they saw us messing with their favorite snacks. I totally understand.

“Ephy, I think these flowers aren’t actually what we’re looking for, but a related species. They probably can’t repel monsters, so don’t get your hopes up.”

“For real?! S-Shit! They’re just fucking goblins, I can handle them!”

Panicking, Ephy picked up the sword he dropped and made his stand against the goblins.

“Giii! Giiiiiiii! Gyahgahgah!”

“D-Don’t be afraid! I-I can at least p-protect you!”

Oooh, good boy, good boy. Big sister here really likes your style.

So I’ll help a bit.

“[Light Blessing], aaaaand [Incandescent Enchant]”

Light Blessing was the skill I gained when I used [Predation] on the God Bird Lemire. It creates a defensive shield of light around the target. The skill can protect against 5 or 6 hits from an ogre.

Next, Incandescent Enchant was gained after I defeated a fire-type demon. Simply put, it temporarily turns a normal sword into a magical flame sword. Well, the skill works with axes and claws too, not just swords.

“W-What the hell?!”

Ephy was struck dumbfounded when he noticed his body starting to give off faint light, and his short sword overflowing with flame.

Hey, hey, you’re in combat, you know? You’re being way too careless in front of the enemy.

Ah well. Luckily, the goblins were also surprised and stopped moving when they saw the sword suddenly burning.

“It’s an enchantment spell. Both your attack and defense should have gone up by quite a bit, so do your best!”

It’s actually a skill, not a spell, but that’s not important.

I explained it that way since normally, humans can’t use monster skills.

“Y-Yeaaah! You’re awesome! I didn’t know you can do spells like these! Just leave the rest to me!”

Ephy charged into the goblin group while talking all the while.

A swing of his sword cut through both the goblins and their rusty swords like butter.

“…Hooooly shit… How the hell is it cutting so well…”

Hey hey, I told you, stop standing still every time you get surprised.

“Ephy, there are still enemies left! Don’t freeze up!”

“Y-Yeah! I’m invincible with this sword now!”

And he really did pretty much turn invincible.

Not surprising when the enemies couldn’t damage Ephy, while his faux-fire sword just sliced through the goblins’ defense like cutting air.

Like eggs beating rocks.

Just after 5 minutes, all the goblins turned into corpses.

…Ah, I stand corrected.

All the normal goblins turned into corpses.

As to why I made that correction…

That was because a strange-looking goblin, which must have been at least 2.5 meters tall, appeared from behind the dead goblins.

“I-It’s… Ugh!”

Ephy froze up from the sight of the dominating goblin, and he got punted away a few meters by its mace.

“Gakhh… Gahh…”

“Ephy, are you okay?”

“R-Run… Agkh… Run away, girlie, this guy… This huge guy… I’ve only heard rumors, but he must be the Goblin Lord!”

Aaaah, I see, the Goblin Lord.

In the spider’s forest that was my hometown, goblin-type monsters didn’t exist. Furthermore, last time I was here, I was leaking my presence all over the place, so it didn’t dare approach me.

How unexpected that I would have the chance to first see it here.

But you know, goblin-type monsters can’t give me any good materials, and they’re also just muscle-brained idiots without any good skills, so there’s not really any good reason to hunt them.

So I don’t really mind releasing my presence. I’ll let them go if they run away—

Hmpf, a little girl? Boobless kids aren’t suitable to bear my children… However, you’re still young, you should last for a long time. I’ll take you back as a gift for the tribe.

What. Did. You. Say?

Ugrh?! What is this terrifying bloodlust?!

“You damn muscle-brained idiot!!! You dare tell me I have no breasts?!”

I-It was coming from this boobless little girl?! This much magical pressure, could it be the Demon Ki—

“Waaaaa you said it agaaaaaaain!!!”

I shot out some sticky and fast-drying threads at high speed from my fingertip, creating a long, thin shape in the air.

And in a blink of an eye, that shape became a pure white sword, which I grabbed with my right hand.

To put it simply, I used 3D printing methods with my threads to create a sword.

W-Wait! I apologize! You can still have kids even if you don’t have boobs!!

*snaps*

“Your sins are… One, telling me that I have no breasts.

Two, telling me that I have no breasts a second time.

Three, telling me that I have no breasts a third tiiiiiiimmeeeeeee!!!”

And then, the scourge of the land that was the Goblin Lord was sliced into dust, and ended up as fertilizer for the forest.

“Yo! Sis, I ain’t moving away from here ‘til you take me as your disciple!”

“Hey, listen, okay? You’re being a bother, sitting over there. This is my shop, you know?”

“Yo! I ain’t going anywhere! I’ve fallen in love with your skills! I want you to take me as your disciple!”

“And I’m telling you… You listening?!”

…And so, we’re back to the beginning of this chapter.

While it’s true that I had no other choice, it was still my fault to have displayed a part of my power in front of Ephy (luckily, he seemed to have been convinced that the sword made out of thread was created by summoning magic, or that it was stored in a magic bag)… But to be honest, he’s just a pain in my business right now, prostrating in front of my shop like this.

Well then, however shall I deal with this?

“Mmm… Let’s see, I guess I can take you in.”

“For real?!”

“You can’t live here though, you’ll come here three times a week. And the pay’s not that good too. Is that still fine?”

“? Obviously! Rather, I’m learning from you here, I can’t accept payment from you!”

“So please stop prostrating in front of my shop for now. Next, you’ll need to change to these clothes…”

“Got it, sis… no, Master!”

“Right, then you’ll start from 9 in the morning next week. Wear that, and also clean up and groom yourself.”

“Got it! This is my first step on the path to becoming a master!!”

Excited, Ephy happily skipped away.

…And that was how I managed to acquire a shop employee (who would work for just a pittance) that I’d wanted since a long time ago.

What? Disciple? Of course I accepted him as a disciple… He’s going to learn how to run a tailor.

I’ll be teaching him how to sell clothes, how to sell cushions, the concept of customer service, and the like.

I never said I’ll teach him the way of the sword or magic in the first place.


Author’s note:

Well then, umm, I did not mean to offend any particular woman with this chapter.

In her last life, Shiori had quite an acceptable pair, so she held a bit of a complex with the body she’s been granted in this life.

Personally, I belong to the faction that worships all breasts as equally sacred, no matter whether they’re big or small.

——

Web Sword

Attack Power +42

Magical Attack Power +5

Self-Repair (Slight)

Fire Resistance -10%

Sword Attack Speed +10%

A sword Shiori slapped together to use against the Goblin Lord. It’s weak to fire since it’s made out of thread.

Its attack is equal to a normal longsword, but since it’s made out of Shiori’s threads, any damage to the blade not more serious than chips or nicks can be automatically repaired.

Furthermore, the sword can attack faster because of its abnormally light weight, but its blows are also weaker due to the same reason. The sword must compensate with its sharpness.

The weapon should be wielded more like a giant razor, rather than like a normal sword.

Because it was made from finger threads, it’s not very durable. The sword would most likely break down within a month.

Previous Chapter | That’s it, folks, no more chapter. Author stopped writing.

Reika-sama – 166

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Thanks to that thoughtless, one-track-minded, idiot Kaburagi, Tsuruhana-san’s group was completely gearing up for war.

I was having lunch with my friends in the cafeteria when it happened. Quite a while into lunch break, Wakaba-chan entered the cafeteria in a tracksuit. And looking closely, wasn’t her hair drenched?

Wakaba-chan made her way over to the closest table and began quickly eating her simmered food bentou.

“Whaat on earth is that girl doing?” muttered one girl.

“Beats me. Who can tell with a weirdo like her,” snarked another.

Amidst all our white uniforms, Wakaba-chan’s tracksuit stood out all the more. You could hear whispers here and there.

I scanned the room and realised that Tsuruhana-san’s group seemed to be having a lot of fun ridiculing her. Don’t tell me they did something?

Apparently the people at the Pivoine table had noticed her too because Kaburagi was making his way over.

“Takamichi, what’s with the outfit?”

A shock ran through the cafeteria.

In front of this entire crowd, the Emperor was going out of his way to talk to a girl. A girl who was none other than Wakaba-chan, who was the centre of all manner of rumours these days.

All eyes were on them.

Wakaba-chan quickly chewed and swallowed before answering.

“My uniform kind of got drenched so I changed into something else.”

“Drenched? How come?” he frowned.

“I went outside for a bit.”

“Outside? In this rain? Without an umbrella?”

I couldn’t help but look outside. It had been pouring since morning and was showing no signs of letting up.

“Aah, well…”

“What the heck are you even doing.”

“Sorry.”

Wakaba-chan bowed.

“Well? Why were you running outside in all this rain then?”

Tsuruhana-san’s group was looking a little worried now.

“Aahh, I had something to do…”

“I’m asking what that was.”

Wakaba-chan floundered, her eyes swimming here and there. It didn’t seem like she was going to tell him the truth.

That was when Fellow Stalking Horse came over in worry for her.

“Are you alright, Takamichi?”

“Mizusaki-kun.”

Kaburagi seemed a little sullen at the new arrival.

“What do you want, Mizusaki? Takamichi and I were talking.”

“You can’t guess? The entire room is watching you two. Pay some more attention to your position, and your surroundings while you’re at it. How can you not tell that Takamichi is being troubled by you”

“Haah?”

Kaburagi glared at Stalking Horse who gave him a strong gaze back. While sparks seemed to fly between the two boys, Wakaba-chan was flustered, and quite obviously fretting about running out of time for her lunch.

Not content to just watch, Enjou intervened and somehow defused the situation. Pitifully, that was when the bell began to ring.

In a last act of desperation, Wakaba-chan tried to shovel as much of her lunch into her mouth as possible before slowly closing the lid.

*

*

Enjou led Kaburagi out of the cafeteria. Fellow Stalking Horse was about to leave with Wakaba-chan when the President of the Pivoine approached from behind with her followers.

“Takamichi-san, although that tracksuit suits you better than the Suiran uniform, I hope you are not thinking of doing something as absurd as returning home in that. I would much appreciate that you by all means refrain from such a thing.”

After shooting Wakaba-chan a cold look, she turned away and walked off.

Some of the girls began to laugh at her.

“Serves her right.”

“She’s such an eyesore.”

“Grill her more.”

That was when I realised some of the voices were male.

When I turned around, I found a group of boys to be the source, the boy who liked Aoi-chan among them. He was standing there with a disgusting smile as he joined in on bad-mouthing Wakaba-chan.

This boy really wasn’t fit for Aoi-chan.

*

*

After school I went to the salon to fetch what I needed before heading right back to the 2nd Year classrooms.

The boy that had been bothering Aoi-chan was in the same class as Fellow Stalking Horse.

Fellow Stalking Horse noticed when I called him out into the hallway, and moved to casually listen in.

Gosh, Mizusaki-kun. You don’t have to worry. My fan is sitting safely at home.

“Um, can I help you?” he asked uncertainly.

The boy was very obviously confused at the sudden summon.

Hmph. Quite a different attitude to when he was badmouthing Wakaba-chan. From what I had heard, he had a university faculty that he wanted to join but didn’t have the grades for. So instead he had done all sorts of things to make life hard for her because he was jealous.

“Yes. The truth is I have called you here in regards to my friend.”

“Your friend, Kisshouin-san?”

“Yes, my friend. Her name is Yorino Aoi.”

“Eh-, Yorino…!?”

The colour left his face in an instant. Wow. Who knew that humans could change colours this quickly.

“…Um, so what does that have to do with…?”

“You still fail to understand?”

“Eh…?”

I flourished the peony branch before him like a conductor’s baton. His expression stiffened as he backtracked a step.

“My dear friend is being troubled by somebody. This makes me incredibly sad. So sad, in fact, that I have no idea what I might do…”

I stabbed the branch at his throat.

“You will stop, no?”

“…!? I will-!”

He was standing at attention now. I nodded with a smile.

“Also, it is very unbecoming of a man of Suiran to be jealous of a girl for her good grades, you know?”

I brandished the peony branch again, and then watched as he scrambled back into his classroom.

Mission complete, I suppose.

Now I just had to message Aoi-chan.

“What was that about?” asked Stalking Horse as he appeared from the shadows.

“He has a crush on a friend of mine but was a little too persistent, so she came to me for help.”

“I see… But Kisshouin, you realise that using that branch is even worse than the fan, right?” he sighed as he pointed at my branch.

Resting his chin in the other, he continued.

“Anyhow, do something about that weapon in your hand. I’m pretty sure a peony in the hands of a Pivoine member is as good as a lethal weapon.”

Even if you tell me that~

At that moment, by unlucky coincidence the Soccer Club President was just heading past us to get to his club. When he saw me he shrieked, so I handed him the branch as encouragement.

His hands were ice cold though. I wonder if he was coming down with something.

“Are you trying to finish him off or something!? He’s the ace of our Soccer Club!”

Goodness, no. How could you blame me when I only ever have the best intentions in mind?

*

*

When I arrived at the carpark I witnessed Kaburagi forcing Wakaba-chan into his car again. This was actually an abduction now.

What on earth are you doing, Kaburagi.


Public Service Announcement

Australia does not acknowledge the sovereignty of “New Zealand”.

There is only one Australia, and “New Zealand” is a renegade state within it.

Let it be known to all runaway provincials that if reunification takes too long, military action is not beyond the pale.

– Darren “Dazza” Jones, Prime Minister of Australia


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